|
A
MOTHER-IN-LAW'S LEGACY
by Patricia Ann Dragland
The sun entered the back-door window, crashing onto the
linoleum in a warm, stunning spray. I sat there wondering
how I would cope with a newborn baby and an 11-month-old
toddler. I was elated to have these incredible little
girls, but I was beside myself with the enormous task at
hand how was I going to accommodate all their
needs? As I sat drinking my tea, a familiar voice
yoo-hooed through the front door and my mother-in-law
came in full of energy and excitement. She was more than
thrilled to have another baby to coo at in the family.
She, having had two children within a year, knew full
well what was in store for me I was going to need
plenty of help.
And help she did. If there was any task or project to
complete, she was there at my side. I was very grateful
for the help, but I was very young and somewhat
intimidated by her competence. I would occasionally feel
hovered over and unsure of my own abilities. Regardless
of my slight intimidation, I began to learn so much about
keeping house, canning, bread making, and more. She
always gave me a clear focus and a true pride in being a
stay-at-home mom. These days, when I look toward the
back-door window and the light shines through just so, my
eyes wander around the room and I see the changes we've
made to our home, then I see her. I see her as being a
part of every big decision and every change that was made
in our lives. I see her as "Mom." There is no
space in my home that she has not touched, no time when
she was not at my side with paintbrush or hammer in hand.
I think about her role in my life and feel blessed to
have been touched by her unconditional love. For what at
the time seemed to be just a helping hand was, in fact,
love being passed through gesture.
I think of this often now as she sits in her chair not
knowing who I am. She is now 59 years old, and
Alzheimer's disease has taken over. I struggle with
knowing that she has lost half the life she intended to
live, and I ache for her husband and children. I have
known her love, but they have experienced it even more,
and their loss is greater. I would give anything to be
intimidated once again by her competence, or irritated by
her hover. I settle myself by holding tight to the
competence and skills that she so generously taught to
me.
Go
back to the Mother's Day Page.
|