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Dahling is a German name
The name appeared as Darling in 19th century American records, but the h must have been mistaken for an r. Our family emigrated from Vellahn parish, Mecklenburg, where the spelling was Dähling (or Daehling).
The ä is said to have been originally written with two sideways e's instead of the umlaut. This meant the a sound was modified by the e sound. To pronounce Dähling, form your mouth as if saying ah. Without changing position, say ee.This sounds much like the a in mate, which is how some texts simplify pronunciation. Our name is more correctly pronounced Day-ling than Dah-ling.
In Pomerania, the name was spelled as Döling, Dehling, Deling, Daehling, and Dähling by different generations of one family. Other spellings included Doeling, Döhling, and Doehling. I've seen no references in current books about German surnames. Many think the name is Swedish, as some from that land use the Dahling name and pronounce it Dah-ling. Your first clue as to ancestry of the nameholder would be the pronunciation, though we do have German relatives in America that adopted the Swedish pronunciation.
Mrs. Harold (Nadine) Dahling of Elkader, IA can trace her husband's family to his great-great-grandparents, Wilhelm Dahling and Elizabeth Schultz, in Mecklenburg. I'm sure they were from near Vellahn, but I cannot yet prove a connection. They pronounce the name as we do and once ran across the following:
Dähling (Thölinge) - Mecklenburg, Germany; became simplified to Dahling.
Dahling in Germany
Dähling was a rather common name in Vellahn parish, Mecklenburg. It also occured elsewhere. Carl Friedrich Jürgen Dähling and his entire family for several generations hailed from Brahlstorf in Vellahn. His wife, Anna, was from nearby Neuhaus, Hannover. Vellahn records are intact and available on LDS microfilm. I was told by an LDS volunteer that the Neuhaus records were destroyed by fire, but I later found that some of them indeed survive.
Dahling in the USA
My Emigrant Dahling Family Name Born USA Died Burial [John] Hans Heinrich Dähling 03 Jul 1794 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg 30 Jun 1854 on the Domingo from Hamburg to New York 07 Mar 1869 Goodhue County, MN probably Goodhue County, MN [Mary] Catharina Maria Dorothea (Tesch) Dähling 02 Jun 1796 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg
30 Jun 1854 on the Domingo from Hamburg to New York
26 Jun 1882 Goodhue Co, MN probably Goodhue County, MN death record at St. John's Lutheran Church, Goodhue Twp, Goodhue Co, MN Johann Heinrich Christopher Dähling 27 Mar 1821 Brahlstorf,Mecklenburg May not have Unknown 
Unknown stillborn boy 03 Oct 1822 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg did not 03 Oct 1822 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg unknown [Charles] Carl Friedrich Jürgen Dähling about 05 Sep1825 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg 26 Aug 1852 on the Guttenberg from Hamburg to New York 17 Jun 1891 Red Wing, MN 
St. John's Lutheran Cemetery, Red Wing, MN Anna Sophia Maria (Dähling) Klahr [later Klair] 26 Feb 1829 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg 30 Jun 1854 on the Domingo from Hamburg to New York 1857 Goodhue County, MN Goodhue County, MN Sophia Maria (Dähling) Wiech 08 Jul 1833 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg 30 Jun 1854 on the Domingo from Hamburg to New York 22 Jun 1887 Goodhue Co, MN St. John's Lutheran Cemetery, Red Wing, MN stillborn boy 09 Jul 1833 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg did not 09 Jul 1833 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg unknown Christina Maria Dorothea Dähling 27 Jan 1839 Brahlstorf, Mecklenburg 30 Jun 1854 on the Domingo from Hamburg to New York unknown unknown
Carl Friedrich Jürgen Dähling arrived with his wife, Anna, in New York on 26 Aug 1852. His parents, Hans Heinrich Dähling and Catharina Maria Dorothea Tesch (John and Maria Dahling) arrived on 30 Jun 1854. Arriving with them were Carl's sister and nephew, Anna and Carl Klahr, and sisters Sophie and Stina. We have no clue what became of Stina after emigration.
We don't know what happened to Hans and Maria Dahling after their arrival in 1854, but the 1865 census for Hay Creek Twp, Goodhue Co, MN shows them living with Fred Klair. Hans died in 1869, and Maria was living with the Fred and Sophie Wiech family in Hay Creek in the 1870 and 1875 census. She died in 1882.
Fred Wiech came to America in 1852, settled in or near Buffalo, NY, and married Sophia Dahling, apparently after her arrival in 1854. They settled in Hay Creek township of Goodhue County, MN in 1854 and moved to Red Wing in 1877. (The signatures of Carl Dahling and Fred Wiech are as witnesses for the military pension application of Henry Bohmbach.)
The History of Goodhue County says that Fred Klair (Klahr) was one of the early settlers of Belvidere township. He arrived in Alden, NY from Germany in 1852 and married Anna Dahling in 1853. I cannot reconcile that with Anna and Carl Klahr arriving in 1854 with her parents. The Klair family arrived in Red Wing, MN in Oct 1855 and moved into their log cabin in section 8 in December. After Anna died in 1857, Fred went to Wisconsin and apparently left Carl, who died soon after, with the Wiech family. He later returned to Belvidere and started a new family.
The obituaries of Carl and Anna Dahling conflict with other sources about their arrival. In fact, Anna's obituary probably contains several errors. With their daughter, Augusta, they lived near Alden, NY at least through the state census of June, 1855. The History of Goodhue County states that Hay Creek township was first settled in the spring of 1854, and that Charles Darling (Carl Dahling) was an early settler. They settled next to Fred and Sophie Wiech. County land records show their homestead was recorded on 4 Mar 1863.
The farm in section 32 stayed in the family for three generations and well over 100 years, the last in Hay Creek, and apparently Goodhue County, to be owned by the original family of homesteaders. They first built a log cabin north of the present house toward the hill. This was torn down when they built the house that now stands on the homestead. Their son, Carl, was born in 1857 in the cabin. Legend has it that it was raining during his birth and the roof leaked, so they held an umbrella over his mother. It was Anna's job to milk the cow, so after Carl was delivered, it seems her husband brought the cow inside for her to milk. My great uncle, Eddie, sold the farm in the early 1970s. Though it was in the family long enough, it was never recognized as a century farm.
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Johann became a fireman in Red Wing, MN along with his cousin Charles Wiech, and Carl took over the farm after his marriage in 1886. Johann, died from diabetes in 1887, and it is assumed that their parents lived in his house in Red Wing on Plum Street. Courthouse records show that John C. Dahling willed his property to Chas. Dahling in 1889. The elder Carl died in 1891. Anna probably moved back to the farm in 1899, where she died in 1906.
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